Rod End

Divorce: The Bitter End or a New Hope?

I believe that divorce is both an end and a beginning, a Yin and Yang, where you go from the darkness to the light. Is a very hard phase of your life to endure but can be one of the best stages of your life as well.

Many married couples have very close relationships and because their focus is on one another, outside influences rarely have any affect on them. Thus, if an unsatisfying situation leaves you wanting someone you can let into your life anyhow — to spend time with, to confide in, to count on, to empathize with, and to have fun with — you will still be lonely. No more theater or cinemas or bowling, the common things you used to enjoy, do not exist anymore and you feel like the end of the world, technically your world, the way you lived it, is over and done.

My friend, Rod, is typical in his reactions as far as a man would respond to the situation. Eventually his life held no more meaning. He decided that he did not want to live any longer and said, “I am officially dead.” “The only reason I keep breathing” he said “is because I am a coward and can’t end my life.” He essentially stopped believing in himself, quit his high paying job and lived on his savings until they ran out. He found menial jobs that could give him enough money to eat, or he just ate at the Salvation Army. He did not keep in touch with his family, children, or anyone else he knew.

This is the life that many men and women choose to live after a divorce, specially the spouse that suffers the most whom is usually the one that did not want to destroy his or her marriage in the first place or the one that ended carrying most of the economic devastation of the situation. This isolationist state of mind may last for months, years and even decades and in some cases ends in a tragedy.

Time passes on – healing wounds and making you forget. After a while people tend to find balance in there life and then the can enjoy it. They make new friends, they create a new social circle, find a new job, adapt to the new life, and move to a different city or country. But eventually life starts to take shape again, like a seed that starts growing into a plant and eventually will produce beautiful blossoming flowers.

Rod, my old friend, moved South, got a good job making a comfortable living, and he started dating a few women. He traveled, and on vacation to his home country, he found an old love, fell in love all over again and decided to get married. Today, he is living a new happy and prosperous life. He conquered tragedy.

Life is beautiful and it is worth living. You have to overcome obstacles and keep striving for your goals and life. Divorce can be overwhelming but life will go on and you will be happier in the long run. The grass always looks better and brighter on the other side of the hill.

If divorce is a subject you’re interested in, you can learn about my experience as an experienced Austin family law lawyer. You can also take a look at our free online video on divorce in Austin at www.AustinDivorceHelp.com. There is an alternative to the traditional divorce process. Learn how a collaborative divorce attorney in Austin TX can guide you through family disputes with dignity.

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